Drowned In Hate
November 21, 2016
Filed under Opinion
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They drowned me with their cruel words and actions. In the end they broke my spirit, my smile, and my voice. I was just a shy first grader trying to make friends, but instead I found cruel people and discovered their nature at a young age. This was the beginning of the name calling, harassment, tears, and self-worthlessness. I fought through eight years of bullying by myself because no one was going to help me. In first grade when I was being bullied by another girl I spoke up to a teacher but she said to ignore her. At that age I was told if someone is picking on me I need to speak up and an adult will help me. It was a lie and after that I believed no one was going to set up to help me from that day forward. I never spoke up after that.
Elementary and middle school felt like a prison of cruelty where I wore a mask to hide my real emotions. A person said he hated me to my face, I was called a bitch, and lies were told to others about me. People also ignored me and pretended to be mad at me so I would feel bad and apologize for conflicts I never did. Those are only a few examples of the things I came to endure. The one thing that hurt me the most is almost all the individuals that bullied me were my best friends at some point. I felt like a fly on the wall that no one cared about. It was like I was stuck in the shadows while I watched everyone live their life filled with true friends and happiness.
I was always taught to have manners and be kind to others. I tried every day to make others happy so they didn’t go home and cry themselves to sleep. Every day, I thought something was wrong with me and I strived to be perfect. I thought that would solve my problems, but no one is perfect. I became antisocial and very quiet in class. Because of this bullying, I hate getting attention and I always feel like there is someone talking about me behind my back. I can’t help these negative thoughts that feed my mind. It’s like fighting a battle with myself even though I am not being bullied any more; the memories still haunt me.
However, I am finding my happiness again with the people I surround myself with and talk to each day. Everyone wants to be happy and this starts with finding yourself and by treating others how you want to be treated. Overall, going through the bullying over the years has made me a stronger person by standing up for myself and becoming the best version of me I can be.
Facts about Bullying:
- More than 3.2 million students are victims of bullying every year.
- Almost 160,000 teens skip school each day because they are being bullied.
- 17% of American students report being bullied 2 to 3 times at school per month or semester.
- 1 in 4 teachers don’t see a problem when a student reports bullying and only 4% of teachers intervene.
If you are being bullied or view others being bullied please contact a person of authority if possible.
In general, stand up for those around you and don’t allow for someone to feel less than.